Posted in Thoughts and the Past

The Internet is NOT a Replacement for my Profession!

I’m sick of people judging me and my profession. There is no such thing as the food police. You ignorant   You unknowing judgmental people. Do you know how annoying it is to hear the same boring, (insulting even!) stupid joke every time I tell someone what it is I majored in?

Ignoramus:

Oh, so what are you studying?

Me (already knowing what is coming):

………..uhh…….. (trying to decide if I want to answer or change the topic of conversation)

………(deciding this person might be different. Telling myself I shouldn’t be ashamed to admit what I’m pursuing)

Nutrition….

Ignoramus:

OoOoH! DoN’t LoOk aT Me! YoU GoNnA PuT mE oN A dIeT??? UhhhHhhHhFbnZS: VBHI

(sorry, got a little frustrated there.)

Continue reading “The Internet is NOT a Replacement for my Profession!”

Posted in Personal Poetry Collection

Sweet Regret – Personal Poetry Collection

HA! A lot has happened since I wrote this. I stand with what I wrote, but good riddance!

 

December 19, 2019

Sweet Regret

I regret nothing.

not the broken heart,

not the shattered psyche,

not the betrayal.

 

I lie, but my name is not Judas.

I fight against this.

 

What I felt was real.

What we can never admit aloud

because I enjoyed it.

 

I would choose it again, but I do regret

the circumstances.

Posted in Personal Poetry Collection

Wishing You the Best, Even if that isn’t Me – Personal Poetry Collection

The last poem hurt; this one just has me numb.

 

December 12, 2019

Wishing You the Best, Even if that isn’t Me

I hope you are happy.

And if you are not,

I hope you will be.

 

I hope she makes you happy

more than I ever could.

I hope she cooks with you

like we once did.

Let her love you

more than I do.

Talk to her

as you do me.

 

I respect your choice.

I understand.

I wouldn’t have picked me either.

 

Just be happy,

and I will smile through my tears

through all my fears

for you

what I wouldn’t do.

 

 

 

Posted in My Life Now, Texas- Living with Parents

Week of January 13th 2020- Hitting the Breaks on Triathlon Training and Getting Pep Talks from Friends and Family

This week was a strange one. It was sad, yet hopeful. Lonely and full of friends/family. I felt utterly misunderstood and as if I were watching a movie about my life. I’m struggling with indecision and fighting against what is holding me back from moving on with my life and beginning my career that will spearhead the next chapter. Before that though, let’s start with sadness.

Monday, Jan. 13th- Sleeping the Day Away and Helping Mom find her Classroom

I woke up at 4pm today. I think I slept at like 2 or 3am. Eh. Going back to my old ways of sleeping the morning and as much of the day away as possible. This isn’t good. Continue reading “Week of January 13th 2020- Hitting the Breaks on Triathlon Training and Getting Pep Talks from Friends and Family”

Posted in Personal Poetry Collection

Still I Wait for You – Personal Poetry Collection

I don’t want to explain this one. Seems obvious.

 

December 12th, 2019

Still I Wait for You

Why did you let me go?

Why did you hold me

if you did not love me so?

 

Still I wait for you.

It’s up to you,

but you don’t love me.

I don’t blame you.

 

I fell for you with a word,

a touch,

a look,

and one afternoon

after countless nights

spent in mutual kindred

yearning for something more.

 

You were already lost

when I found you.

I was already high

when you first picked me up.

 

From the ground you took me,

brushed me off,

shook me down,

and spun me around.

 

You are going to ruin my life

as much as you’ve given me.

 

We are magnets

from the same pole.

I tell myself it would never work

but, even so, my heart continues to lurk.

 

My poor, tired, heart of stone

carved by your hand

and smashed by your words.

 

Soon, you’ll be gone

and I will still believe

for you she is good.

As I fight to reject

that I could have been too.

 

Why did you hold me?

and why did you let go?

if you did not love me so?

 

Still I’ll wait for you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Note:

Inspiration for the photo: 3AM by Finding Hope (lyrics by Aminium Music)

Posted in My Life Now, Texas- Living with Parents

Week of January 6th 2020- First Official Week of Triathlon Training and Some Non-Official Translation Gigs

It is Thursday night as I begin writing this. I hadn’t planned on returning to this blog. I mean, I’m glad that I have, but it happened naturally, not as part of a New Year’s resolution or personal goal or anything of the sort. It’s probably better that way. I’m back because I want to be, not because I’m forcing myself to be.

I was going to start weekly blogging two nights ago, on Tuesday, but as I started writing I realized there were countless battles I waged with myself over the last six months in my mind, that I had to at least attempt to explain those occurrences on the surface. Here’s that attempt at a sort of update. The following night (Wednesday) I figured I may as well start fresh with the start of the New Year and make a weekly blog post of my first week of the year.

Yep… so now it’s Thursday… Let’s see what I can remember…

 

Monday, Jan. 6th- Probably Made a 10 Week Triathlon Training Plan

I technically stayed up Sunday night until early Monday morning (3am-ish) to make a training schedule, so that counts, right? Well, I already had a plan, but upon a bit more research I found it probably would not have been ideal. It was much more intense than a beginning training schedule should be. I haven’t exercised in about a month (minus the day before and the day of that indoor triathlon I’d done on Sunday). Starting from 0 to 12 hours of exercise a week probably would not have been a good way to start the season.

So, much to my dismay, this week’s plan is about 4 hours. I mean, from 0 to 4 hours that’s still a big jump, but I am antsy. I like to progress fast and am prone to getting impatient if I don’t see results in whatever it is I do. I like positive change and more than that, I like the validation or proof of it happening. But, fine… Slow and steady, that’s what they say wins the race, right? *sigh… Lessons in patience, I guess. Today was my first day I didn’t have other engagements since getting back from my trip to West Texas with my college buddies, so apart from making a family meal plan for the week and going on an hour indoor bike ride, I just relaxed and watched T.V. with my mom.

Below will be this week’s training plan, but basically it consists of 2 one hour stationary bike rides, 2 thirty minute treadmill runs/walks, and 2 thirty to forty minute indoor pool swims.

 

Tuesday, Jan. 7th- Probably Finally Paid for Dietetic State Licensure and Translated for Brother’s Doctors Appointments

Yes, I finally took a moment to read through some important emails about my new dietetic license and the accompanying fees and continuing education requirements I need to complete. I should be getting an official card with my state license to practice dietetics in Texas in the next two or three weeks. Yay!

Other than that, I got up at 6:13am. Know how I remember that? Because my dad and brother usually leave the house by 6:10am and I was so tired I’d fallen asleep after waking up for the first time at 5:45-ish am. I kid you not, we were in the car and on our way by 6:15am. I don’t even know how I got out of bed and dressed that fast…

But, it was important to me to go. Yes, it’s my brother’s appointment, but my dad does a lot to help my brother with his health and this was his 1 year check up appointment with several different doctors and disciplines after his kidney transplant. So… yes, important. And important for me to go to ease the language barrier. I know hospitals have translators, but if I’m available, why not help out?

Case in point: while doing a sonogram we found out my brother had his gallbladder removed. Neither my dad nor my brother knew (my brother was too young to remember at the time we suspect it was removed). I’m sure my dad signed the papers necessary to allow the surgery, but there was a lot going on at the time and I highly suspect when situations get critical there’s less time to get a translator and talk through every little (or not so little) procedure. I’m glad to be back so things like this aren’t as likely to happen.

 

Wednesday, Jan. 8th- Translating for Mom’s Doctor’s Appointment and Why I Care About Language so Much

Continue reading “Week of January 6th 2020- First Official Week of Triathlon Training and Some Non-Official Translation Gigs”

Posted in My Life Now, Texas- Living with Parents

My First Weekly Blog of 2020- Visiting College Buddies, New Year, New Job?, First Triathlon! (Yes, all in 7 days)

Things have been half crappy, half okay. …All in all, I like those odds.

 

Monday, December 30, 2019- Lazing around in West Texas

So, if you read the update I posted a few days ago, you’ll know that I planned a little vacation following my dietetic certification exam as motivation/kind of punishment depending on how that turned out. Fortunately, I passed and am now a registered dietitian. I’d spent the weekend crashing on my former university roomie’s couch in West Texas. However, Sherri had a flight to catch in order to visit family this Monday morning, so I found myself waking up in Mariah and Richard’s bed. 😬 (<- my favorite emoji, by the way)

Continue reading “My First Weekly Blog of 2020- Visiting College Buddies, New Year, New Job?, First Triathlon! (Yes, all in 7 days)”

Posted in Texas- Living with Parents

Fall 2019- Being Sad then Doing Something About It (Overall Summary of the First Six Months since Moving Back in with my Parents After 5 Years Away at University and Such)

A lot has happened since summer when I wrote my last “weekly” blog, haha…… so before posting that this weekend, this is the shortest version I could bring myself to write about the highlights (and lowlights) of the last six months since I’ve moved back in with my parents.

 

Lots of Sadness with One Glimmer of Happiness for someone else, not me (of course!)

Continue reading “Fall 2019- Being Sad then Doing Something About It (Overall Summary of the First Six Months since Moving Back in with my Parents After 5 Years Away at University and Such)”