Posted in Personal Poetry Collection

Onto the Next – Personal Poetry Collection

Basically, I don’t believe there is such a thing as enough. And it terrifies me. So, I constantly jump to the next thing hoping that becomes enough “enough” for me.


December 12, 2019

Onto the Next

There is no end

my friends

they say,

“don’t delay

soon will be your day!”


But next thing I know

I’m outside a new door

cold and sore

no space to soar

too quiet to roar

time to pick up an oar.


And to the next river go.

What happens when at sea?

At peace will I be?


is there more to see?








Picture from Pexel’s Free Photo Library


Posted in Personal Poetry Collection

Will You Accept Me as I Am? – Personal Poetry Collection

I wrote this poem in different colored permanent markers in my art journal, hence the different colored text. It’s about acknowledging I’m a work in progress and hoping the people in my life accept and support my crazy form of progression.


December 12, 2019

Will You Accept Me as I Am?

please forgive me all my ails.

for I have not yet set sail

The grit still on my nails

and self doubt like hail


All around me the storm begins

Will you seek shelter?

or through the chaos grin?


I wish, for you, I had more to give.

I know this is no way to live

My mind like a sieve.

you, yes

me, moot

my life is a fib.


Ever since the crib.

until now – ad lib


Let me cry.

Let me fall.

Let me get high

then let me stall

until I do it again.









Picture from Pexel’s Free Photo Library

Posted in My Life Now, Texas- Living with Parents

New Year’s Resolutions for 2020 – Progress as of May 1st

April Update


blue tape measuring on clear glass square weighing scale
1) Weight Loss
  • Lose enough weight to be classified as overweight at a BMI of 24.9 or less (weight loss of about 30 pounds)

    • Overall: 
      • BMI still about 35.2 like it was in December. 😦
    • April
      • Gained back those 5 pounds. Back to a BMI of 35. :/
      • Hadn’t weighed myself for the first three weeks of April. I didn’t even care I’d lost 5 pounds. I hadn’t done anything for that to happen. When I gained them back I was disappointed and didn’t want to think about my weight so I ignored it until the last week of April when I started weighing myself daily.
      • I’m still fluctuating between 34.7ish (obese category 1) to 35.2ish (obese category 2) BMI. Yeah, it sucks, but I’m not exercising much anymore (I used to go run, swim, and bike at the gym). Now, I do short home workouts. Just started doing them and it was 5 times a week but only like 30 minutes a day, maybe.
    • March
      • Haven’t lost or gained weight as of March 22nd still 34.4 BMI
    • February
      • Lost weight to achieve a BMI of 34.4 (obese category I) by February 4th
      • Stayed pretty much stable the following week at a BMI of 34.5 by Feb. 10th
      • Gained a pound to a BMI of 34.7 by Feb. 17th
      • Lost that pound. Back to starting weight in February by March 2nd (BMI 34.4)
    • January
      • Gained weight to my highest BMI of 35.2 (obese category II)


tilt shift lens photography of five assorted vegetables
2) Get a job in my Profession
  • Get a job as a dietitian (preferably a clinical dietitian)

    • Overall: 
      • Applied to 14 dietetic positions since January
      • Rejected by 5
      • No response from 8
      • Offered 1, but I declined it.
      • As of April, this is not a current goal.
    • April
      • The second job I applied to in West Texas responded. I did a video call interview and they offered me a dietetic supervisor position for the six or so clinics in the area. I turned it down. Yeah. I’m insane. First place to throw me a bone and I reject it.
      • I decided to take a gamble and work on other interests of mine instead of focusing on job hunting in my field of dietetics. If I get a job in dietetics great; if not, that’s fine too. I’m doing interpreter training at the moment, so after completing it and taking the certification exams, I’ll be searching for a medical interpreting job.
    • March
      • Applied to two more dietetic positions on March 25th. This time in West Texas. 
      • One hospital decided to close the dietitian position due to coronavirus. The other has not responded.
    • February
      • Applied to three PRN clinical dietitian positions (February 3rd and 4th)
      • Applied to 5 full time, 1 part time and 2 on call dietitian positions on February 25th Rejected by 2 thus far and no reply from the rest as of yet.
    • January
      • Finished new licensure requirements such as payment and continuing education planning
      • Applied to one full time clinical dietitian position


people in swimming pool
3) Complete a Triathlon

Continue reading “New Year’s Resolutions for 2020 – Progress as of May 1st”